So another lazy Sunday… except for the fact that I am about 2000 miles from home.

The bed was re-inflated, so it was a much more comfortable rest. Evan popped off to church in the morning and I stayed to work on the other big computer problem, that off connecting his two printers so that both his iMac desktop and his IBM laptop can access them at will. Despite my best efforts, I was unable to solve the problem perfectly. Unfortunately, one of his printers is one of those multifunction inkjet jobs (fax/scan/copy/print) and print servers treat them like plague carriers. Inelegant as I think it is, I was able to set it up so that they are both plugged into the iMac and shared so that the laptop can print to them both. (Yay me!) I appreciate the proliferation of Apple’s Bonjour technology making that possible. As a reward, Evan let me take the now-unused print server home with me, where I can now use it to set up my laser printer at home for use with all three of my machines. (Yay Evan!) With the second desktop I got from my brother (Yay Ben!), I can now keep a Windows PC, my iBook laptop and start fiddling around with Linux on the side. I am so excited! Now if I’ll just have time between all my classes, homework, Mensa duties, my job, acting gigs, laundry– sorry. I got distracted. Back to the recent past.

My mother and I made a trip to one of Gallatin’s local grocery stores (in this case, a Kroger, the company that also owns my favorite local supermarket — Fry’s Food & Drug) so that I could stock up on a few goodies for the last leg of my drive out to Orlando. We also drove around and Mom showed me the sights of Gallatin… at least, what there was of it. She even showed where she had to go get blood drawn for her tests. Wow! (Still love you, Ma)

To be fair, my mom comes off as a bit absent-minded and goofy… and she is. But she’s my mother, not yours and it works for me. Besides, she even let me do laundry and patched a hole in one of my pocket t-shirts. Cool.

So the bed was uncomfortable. apparently it was a little low on air, so it didn’t provide as much support as it could have. No biggie, it was the first night and we can re-inflate it later.

So we took a family field trip into Nashville to visit the Frist Center, a “non-collecting institution” (their brochure). It’s an art museum with all rotating exhibitions… I guess it’s cheaper that way (and yes, it was created by the family of Senator Bill Frist — it is Tennessee, remember). They had two exhibits we were intending to see, an Egyptian artifact collection and a touring exhibit of Pulitzer Prize-winning photographs. The Egyptian exhibit seemed waaay too expensive for what we could see through the window, so we opted to just see the photos.

(I’ll interrupt this narrative briefly to play on my beloved mother’s legendary inability to find her way around places. (Love you, Ma.) Even she will admit that she sucks at finding her way around. It’s become a bit of a running joke between the two of us stretching back to a fateful road trip to from our home in Pennsylvania to a family wedding in Vermont in 1984 and an unexpected side trip to Utica. But I digress. Relying solely on directions from a service like MapQuest is probably not a great idea. To be fair, I didn’t necessarily know where we were going either and the highway system within the greater Nashville area is, to paraphrase my step-dad Evan, “spaghetti crazy”. Now, back to the rest of the story.)

The photo exhibit was amazing. I can see why these all won the prize. This collection was, by their words, the most comprehensive collection available for public viewing. The infamous photo from the Vietnam War by the recently departed Eddie Adams was on display, as well as photos of union picketers beating up a scab, starving children in Ethiopia, a daring bridge rescue from the 40s of a semi truck hanging over the side of a bridge (loved that one… taken by a teenage girl with a Brownie Hawkeye). They even some of the most recent winners, including one of the second tower exploding on 9/11 and a shot of Marines unloading the coffin of a military casualty (I think it was from Iraq) off of a passenger flight with all the passengers still on board watching from the little windows. Way cool. But my personal favorite was a photo from the 1992 presidential campaign. Bill Clinton was schmoozing in New Hampshire when they stopped in an ice cream parlor. The photo is of him, resting his head on his hands on the counter conversing with a 5 year-old who was kneeling on the other side (where they access the ice cream). Very classy. That man can charm just about anyone and that kid’s shins must have been freezing.

In any case, that exhibit was a fascinating way to spend a few hours expanding my consciousness of the world outside. Nevertheless, all good things must come to an end, so we managed to find our way back to Gallatin, this time with a minimum of muss and fuss. The rest of the afternoon was pretty relaxed. I fixed up their computer issues with their network and new DSL connection (thanks a bunch, Bellsouth). A big thank you to the forums at BroadbandReports.com for providing help in that area. Then, we all took a trip out to the local Kmart, mainly because my mother also wanted to take advantage of the sales tax holiday and buy me some more clothes, bless her heart. BTW, does every state but mine do this? Get on the stick, Arizona!!

::melodrama:: Won’t someone PLEASE… think of the children?!!! ::/melodrama::

Last note… saw the first two episodes of Deadwood on DVD. Rocked!!! I totally have to see the rest of the series now. Just wish I had free cable at home.

I left Wyoming early in the morning to head on my way to parents’ new home in Gallatin, TN (a suburb of Nashville). I was kind of sad to leave my uncle this time out. I had such a good time even for those couple of days and I know he enjoyed having me there because he told me so. Repeatedly.

I spent the night in Columbia, MO about an hour east of Kansas City. I passed through Kansas City just about sunset, which was oddly coincidental because the last time I passed through KC, on a disastrous trip in 2003 to Iowa, it was also sunset. But it was uneventful this time. In the morning, I drove a little further, then stopped in at a Walmart Super Black Hole of Commerce to get a few foodstuffs and take advantage of Missouri’s sales tax holiday to buy some school supplies. (SCORE!!!)

Stopped into Metropolis, IL briefly this afternoon. How can resist swinging in to see the giant statue of Superman? Way cool.

I pulled into my folks at about 3:30 or so (TN time). They were surprised I was able to find my way to their house without using MapQuest or some other online service. Nothing ever beats stopping at a grocery store to peruse road atlases for free, baby. Their house is nice… a bit on the small side for them apparently since they are adding a sun room to the house. I am going to be sleeping on one of those AeroBeds that my mother picked up for guests. Supposedly, it’s better than sleeping on their sofa bed that they have in the guest room. We’ll see…

My uncle and I went out prairie dog hunting again. Sam was going to join us originally, but backed out at the last minute so it was just the two of us. Hunting for prairie dogs with my uncle is a lot like fishing is for normal folks — out in the middle of nowhere, just relaxing in a boat (or, in this case, his pickup truck) waiting for the plague of rodentia to show themselves out of the tiny holes they create with their miniature city of underground tunnels. I got way too much sun today, but I also lessened the prairie dog population of Wyoming by a couple dozen more. Shot a lot better last year, but for me it was far better quality to spend with the guy who had far more of a father-figure impact on my life than my own dad.

Bonding times like these are important for guys, I think. I never used to believe that, but I think that was because I spent most of my childhood buried in books. I get it now. I think that’s probably my brother maximizes the time he gets with his son — so that he has a better relationship than we did with our dad… and I’m sure he will, because I’ve seen how focused he gets on a good cause and his son is definitely the best cause yet.

I took this photo yesterday while on the first leg of my road trip to Orlando. Okay, so it’s not too winding in this photo, but believe me it had quite a few turns on the way.

I am currently lounging in relaxation at my uncle’s house in Wyoming. The trip was uneventful save for some rain and a rather extreme lack of sleep. It was an unsuccessful attempt to sleep between getting off of work at 6:30am on Sunday morning and leaving at about 12:30pm that same day and continued driving until I stopped in Santa Fe when I started hallucinating on the road. Never a safe bet.

There were a couple of odd (read “funny”) things I saw on the way up here:

1) On a railroad trestle I passed under in Pueblo, CO, someone spray painted “DANNY GLOVER!!!” on the side. I wish I could’ve gotten a pic of that because it was so absurd to see that there of all places. Maybe I should propose a Photoshop contest for that on Something Awful or Worth1000.

2) I passed one of these on I-25:

This is actually just an industrial concrete pumping truck. Nothing too special, except that the brand name made me laugh in a geeky high-school loser fashion.

“Putzmeister“. ‘Nuff said.

Anyways, I made it up here late yesterday afternoon and after a good night’s sleep, I was able to settle down for a good day’s slacking off. Although there was a new wrinkle in the household: a last-minute addition in the form of an exchange student from Serbia! Apparently, some friends of my aunt and uncle were supposed to host him for a year and he was going to finish high school. But due to some background check glitches, they were cancelled at the last minute and my aunt and uncle agreed to host him instead. Sam (a nickname instead of Vladimir) is a nice enough kid, looking to finish high school and college and eventually join the Marines. Since his student visa is only for a year, I’m not sure how he’ll do that, but more power to him.

So he will still be living here for a while after I’m gone. In the meantime, Sam, my uncle Bob and I all went out to the rifle range for a little while today to give Sam his first real exposure to guns and their proper handling. He didn’t do too bad for his first day and I’m sure that he’ll improve over the year. My uncle taught me how to handle guns and he’s the only one in the world I feel completely safe around when he’s holding a firearm. In fact, this is the only place I ever go shooting because I prefer not to own a gun at home. It makes it a real treat to spend time with Uncle Bob doing something we both enjoy and makes it a real vacation for me.

And one last brief bit of good family news. I spoke to my brother today and he and his wife have sold their house. Even with the downturn in the real estate market in Phoenix and nationwide, their place was only on the market for about 1-1/2 days before they got an offer for the full asking price of the house. Everything is coming up roses for them pretty much and they’re moving to Albuquerque next month. They’ll even be moving practically debt-free, having only the mortgage on their new house to pay. Bravo… you lucky bastard.

So the Fourth of July kind of came and went with no fanfare. I got called into work… and proceeded to sit on my ass for about 7 hours. What the heck, it was worth the extra stuffing in my paycheck this week.

My brother just told me officially that he and his family are moving out of Phoenix. Lucky bastard. I just need to hold out for another 18 months. That has never seemed so far off as it does now.

In preparation for my upcoming vehicular sojourn (ROAD TRIP!!!!) to Orlando, I may be testing some new additions to the blog out in the next couple of weeks… audio and video! Will it work? Well, I’ll give it a shot and see how I feel about it.

Fear is a strong thing. It can motivate us or paralyze us, depending on how well we are equipped to deal with it and handle life as it if thrown at us.

I must be the most motionless person in all creation.

Thinking back on my post from last night, a thought came to me: What am I afraid of — food? Why would I allow that kind of power over me. The “mindless eating” thing makes me wonder what I would do if I really faced what I was doing. It’s obvious that I’m not doing that now, but I cannot see why I’m not. Have I given up on all the hard challenges in front of me? I doubt that. Finishing college is a difficult thing for anyone to handle, especially with costs going up all over and wages… well, not. This fitness thing should be nothing and in a way I suppose it is. It is nothing until I start obsessing over it, much like I am now.

So why not do something about it? I still can’t figure it… so maybe I should leave it up to the invisible audience out there who may or may not actually have read this far. What say you?! Let me know.

BTW, I took this Purity Test (this is so NSFW) that was referred to me off a mailing list… I scored
91.4% pure. I’m not sure that at my age, that’s really a good thing.

Ok, so about 1 1/2 years ago, I joined Weight Watchers at the behest of my doctor to lose weight. Fine, fair enough.

It all started smoothly enough I think, but for the last year I really haven’t been getting anywhere. And I started thinking the title question to myself in relation to the money that I’ve been spending and the time to go to meetings in rooms full of strangers — usually all middle-aged housewives — and sit like you’re in Driver’s Ed and listen to “the leader” talk about a given topic for the week. I’ve sat through a few different leaders lately, trying to see if there was one that really connected with me… and there isn’t. One just talked about her cat all the time; another one kept looking at me in mock pity whenever one of the other attendees mentioned their husband/significant other (I was the only male in the building).

But the biggest truth of all of this is that I really never wanted to figure out why I’m doing it. From an intellectual standpoint I know all the positives for losing the weight but I am failing to connect with myself emotionally to find the drive I need to push through it and see myself through the program.

I think a part of it comes from feeling like I have to do it alone. Even in a room of other people trying for a healthier life, I feel completely isolated. I suppose it’s just an extension of how I’ve been my whole life. As a kid, I buried myself in books at all hours of the day. Later, that was substituted by the Internets and other various electronic distractions. Even now as I’m typing this, I can’t get away from being by myself. I’m sitting on campus in an isolated corner of the library. I shut myself off from the world to be alone with my thoughts. Why?

I suppose I think they’re too dark and personal to share with anyone, but if that were the case, would I really be putting them down here for all the world to see? Probably not, since I usually pretty sure that no one reads this anyway.

Once again, alone in a crowd… but I digress a bit. Back to the weight thing.

I often think the issue might if I’m content with where I am in terms of poundage. I never really give it a lot of thought, I suppose. Maybe that’s the problem… mindless eating, not being in the moment with the food, if that makes any sense. I could try to vow that I will be better with my food selections and portions, but I’d forget in the morning anyway.

Maybe I lack accountability with my weight loss. I obviously can’t be accountable to myself, as that hasn’t worked. I don’t really feel beholden to the folks at Weight Watchers either. My parents are now about 1700 miles away from me, but even when they only lived down the freeway, I didn’t feel accountable. My brother’s fit as a fiddle and he may also be moving soon… and I won’t deal with my sister on that front. Once again, we come back to isolation.

My, my, how I have rambled on about this. I’d like to say I have something upbeat to end this post with, but that’s life. I’ll be better some other time.

So here I was, all signed up to play in my first major tournament on PokerStars, along with a lot of other bloggers. I was psyched, I was ready, I was in the zone….

I overslept and missed the tourney!

I cannot believe that. I must be on crack to have missed a shot at freerolling into the World Series of Poker (Vegas, baby!) and getting my poker-playing n00b ass kicked by the best in the world.

Now, I’ll admit, I’m not the greatest poker player on this planet (or any other… there, are you happy, Rigel VII??!!), but I felt like I’ve progressed to a point where I can give this a shot. And what the heck, it’s free, right? And I get to hopefully test my skills against the likes of Wil Wheaton and Shane Nickerson.

In other news… nothing is happening. And thank goodness for a little down time. In my last now extremely old post (May 1 — ancient history in Internets time), I did say there was more to come. And there was. The play I was in has ended. Our production of The Importance of Being Earnest was a rousing success and I certainly would have blogged about it here had I remembered that no one ever actually reads it. :-p

After that, finals came and went. I got way more stressed about them than I really had to. I had a good batch of teachers this year and subjects that I really enjoyed. Only three more semesters to go (I hope) before I get that paper that says “Congratulations! You’ve graduated college… good luck paying back that $40K+ in student loans with a Theatre degree!!” My brother suggested just staying in school and that used to be a viable option, but thanks to certain changes at various governmental levels, that’s becoming far more difficult than it is worth. Well, we’ll see, and then we’ll know.

I had the most boring non-event birthday I think I ever had. It fell on the Saturday after finals this year, but it was between my graveyard shifts at work. So my birthday consisted of getting off of work, sleeping, waking up to have lunch with the folks, back to bed, back up and to work again. I got three cards, some money, an email and a very thoughtful text message. Yay.

Okay, enough depression. Got me some slackin’, some unpackin’ (3 months after moving into my new place) and basically… it’s time to get crackin’.

I have registered to play in the PokerStars World Blogger Championship of Online Poker!

This Online Poker Tournament is a No Limit Texas Holdem event exclusive to Bloggers.

Registration code: 9722285